A joke I have loved since I was a kid

At a dinner in Glasgow recently the chat turned to jokes and gags from our childhood.

This is one I heard when I was a kid, and I've loved it ever since. I think I enjoyed the shaggy dog nature of the developing story, and how it grows and grows. I also love jokes like this which discuss different types of people - but turn our stereotypes on their heads.

Here we go.

This guy emigrates from Pakistan to Glasgow, and takes a flat in the South Side. He gets a job, works hard, and makes a success of himself.

After a while, he realises that the months have just flown by, and perhaps it's time to take a trip back home.

So he goes to his local railway station, and asks for a ticket to Peshawar. The ticket guy says "Peshawar? I can't sell you a ticket to Peshawar. You'll need to go to Glasgow Central for that".

So he takes a train to Glasgow Central, and asks the ticket man for a ticket to Peshawar. "Peshawar? You'll need to go to London for that, pal." says the ticket man.

When he gets to London, he goes to the Overseas ticket desk, and asks for a ticket to Peshawar.

"Sorry mate, the closest I can get you is Istanbul, on the Orient Express" he is told. So he gets on the Orient Express, changes in Vienna, and takes the train to Istanbul, where he goes up to the ticket desk.

"Peshawar?" says the ticket man. "Sorry, but the nearest I can get you is Kabul. Take a train to Kabul, and pick up a connection there". So he takes a train to Kabul, and goes up to yet another ticket desk. "Sorry my friend" says the guy at the ticket booth, "But I can only get you to the capital, Islamabad".

So he buys the ticket, and gets the train to Islamabad, where he finally manages to buy a ticket to Peshawar.

He has a great time. He stays with his mammy, attends a few feasts and celebrations, and goes to his sister's wedding.

Finally, after a few weeks with his family, he decides it's time to return to his new home in Glasgow.

So he goes up to the local station, and says "Can I have a ticket to Pollokshaws please?".

And the ticket man says "Pollokshaws East, or Pollokshaws West?".